Things That Must Go

Where I grew up, there was this radio station that I didn't much like, with a morning show I fully hated. But they had one fantastic segment, it was called: Things that must go. Today I have my own list:

1. Minivans

2. Oprah complaining that Sarah Palin is "snubbing" her. - You snubbed her first, you refused to allow her to come on her show when running for Vice President, you didn't have to make it about politics, you could have let her come on and defend herself and her children from all the vicious attacks she was getting, but you didn't. Now you want the ratings of having her on? And didn't you utterly refuse to go on Letterman for years and years?? Don't hurt yourself coming down off your high-horse.

3. The word non-partisan before the word factcheck.org

4. The New York Times referring to itself as a "News" paper, it's an agenda at best

5. People who neither flush nor wash their hands. If you're really too lazy to do either of those two simple things, just take it to the next level and pee your pants.

6. People who feel the need to park closer than 12 inches away from my car. The car is 8 years old - I've hated it for 7 years, it's paid off. I really can't think of any motivation I would have to keep my car nice by not flinging open the door and hitting your car, perhaps you could walk the extra 10 feet by parking somewhere else.

7. The BCS. It is an insult to competition, and even more insulting to my intelligence to suggest that OU is a better team than Texas, when Texas BEAT OU! If you applied the BCS logic to the NFL, the patriots should have got the Lombardi trophy even after loosing the Superbowl.

8. Tattoos on NBA players. I could make a lot of sarcastic commets here, but the tattoos look stupid enough, they don't need my help.

9. Football players doing dances

10. Reality TV

11. The impenitrable wall of smoke and smokers that awaits me every time I enter or leave a building. I seriously have to find ways to disable emergency exits to protect my health.

12. Speaking other languages LOUDLY. Other languages, great, I love the diversity, but just because you think I can't understand what you're saying, doesn't mean I can't hear what you're saying; keep it down.

13. Teenagers at a movie I want to watch.

14. Barbara Walters. Really, it's time.

15. Any analogy to a sporting even being like a battle. Playing a game is not the same as defending your country and putting your life, as well as your future quality of life on the line, all this so people back home can play games.

16. Giving all my personal information before I can buy anything at a store. Give me the CEO's personal address - then he can have mine, in the mean time, here's my money, give me my purchase and leave me alone.

17. Politicians giving speeches about being responsible with taxpayer money in connection to the bailout not being offered the top three auto-makers. Didn't you just give $350 billion to the banks? Don't try to convince me now that you're being careful with my money.

18. The words "campaign promises". For the most recent example of campaign lies: see Barrack Obama.

19. The concept that privileges are rights. We should be able to take care of this in a Junior High Social Studies class.

20. The "N" word in rap music. It can't be okay for black people to use it but not white people. An offensive word is an offensive word, it doesn't matter who says it. Offense is measured by the listener, not the speaker. Ask Don Imus.